[NYTr] Interview: On Being Gay in Iran

[All the News That Doesn't Fit]

sent by tsimonds - activ-l. Sorry about missing punctuation.

Newsweek - Sep 28, 2007
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21033858/site/newsweek

Interview: On Being Gay in Iran

A gay Iranian discusses Ahmadinejads no gays comment and what its like
to live in a country that refuses to accept homosexuality.

By Patrick Falby
Newsweek

Sept. 28, 2007 - To be gay in Iran means a life of fear. Shortly before
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad won his countrys presidential election in 2005,
Iranian authorities hanged two teenagers officially charged with raping
a 13-year-old boybut whom gay activists say were executed for their
sexual orientation. Life for Iranian gays has not improved since then.
Even though Irans senior religious figures have made statements calling
for the whipping or killing of homosexuals, the countrys authorities
continue to deny that they prosecute gays. Against this backdrop its
hardly surprising that the community is outraged over Ahmadinejads glib
comment to his Columbia audience this week that in Iran we dont have
homosexuals like in your country.

Indeed, so great is the insecurity of Iranian gays that even the few who
have found a safe haven in the United States are still afraid of
speaking out about their old lives. NEWSWEEKs Patrick Falby spoke with
Reza, a gay Iranian man who would identify himself only by his
nickname. Reza, who received asylum four years ago, talked about his
life in his home country in the pre-Ahmadinejad eraand what its like
for those still living there. Excerpts:

NEWSWEEK: What was your reaction when you heard Ahmadinejads statement?
Reza: It was embarrassing, the ignorance that he had. He could have said
it a different way; he could have said we have no concept of being gay
in our culture. He could have meant we have no gay phenomenon in our
culture. Many Iranians dont understand homosexuality. If today I went
to my mother and told her Im gay, she wouldnt understand what I mean,
because theres nothing in the media. They dont talk about it. It might
sound strange, but thats the way it is over there. There are basically
places for gay people to go in Iran; theyre public places, like parks.
Places to meet people; you could also call them cruising parks. When I
was watching Ahmadinejads speech, I wanted to tell him if you dont
think there are gay people in Iran you should go to [one of these
parks] and you will see many of them. Its a matter of the government
not wanting to acknowledge that these people exist.

Whats it like being gay in Iran?

You would be the unluckiest person in the world, I guess, to be gay in
Iran. No one can relate to you. You always have to hide your beliefs.
You have to live a lie. You either have to get married and live a
double life or you just have to commit suicide. If youre single for a
long time you can be [asked] why youre not getting married and get
forced to do that.

I chat with people online every now and then, and they say its getting
harder for them because theres more control under Ahmadinejad. If you go
to Internet chat rooms and chat with them you will see how miserable and
disappointed and how sad they feel because of living there. Its not easy
for everybody to get out of that situation. Especially right now, its
very difficult for Iranians to leave Iran: they cannot get visas to
different countries. They just have to deal with the situation, lead a
secret life and tell lies all the time to keep themselves away from all
the troubles they may get into because they are homosexuals living in
that country.

When did you realize you were gay?

I accepted it in my 30s. It took a long time. I started to get
open-minded from the Internet. I knew I liked men since I was a kid.
You always know, because this is the way you are born. You cant do
anything about it.

Did anyone ever find out?

Not really. The only people who know about me right now are my gay
friends. Nobody else knows. I dont wave a rainbow flag, but if people
ask I wont lie about it.

Nobody in your family knows youre gay?

They dont understand. Thats the thing: if you go and tell your mother,
Im gay, shed say, Whats that? What does that mean? Theyd still
expect you to get married if you were attracted to men. They believe if
you like to fool around with another man its that youve got a high sex
drivenot because of your sexual orientation.

How were other homosexuals and lesbians treated?

In Iran the punishment for sodomy is death. There are two ways it can be
proven: it needs to be witnessed by four people, or if the judge
believes that you did it they can execute you.

Why do you think these attitudes exist in Iran?

Over there religion rules the [country]. Its like one hundred years ago
here, when laws were quite different. I guess were one hundred years
back in Iran right now. If you look at womens rights in this country,
150 years ago women were part of the property of men. It changed
through the years. Iran is still backward because of the religionthats
what rules the laws and rules the jurisdiction system and rules the
whole country.

How did you end up applying for asylum in the U.S.?

I would prefer not to answer specific questions about myself, only
general questions. Because of my profession, which I dont want to
disclose, I have advertisements in various gay publications. Every now
and then I get hate phone calls and hate e-mails from Middle Eastern
Muslims that threaten me and say stupid things. Im happy to live in a
free country. I believe that here Im safe.

Do you think youll ever return to Iran?

I have no plans [to return]. Its a matter of where youre safe. I dont
feel safe over there.